Asian Express (Mill Run)

Asian Express is a little Thai/Chinese restaurant in the Mill Run Shopping Center. You can't see it very well from Fishinger Road, so you'd never know it was there unless a friend told you about it. And I, Caspar Fine-Burger, am that helpful friend.

I first heard about Asian Express from a friend whose father had just opened a store next door selling video games and pogs.* The pog store is long gone, but Asian Express remains, because they serve very good food at reasonable prices with friendly service.

I stopped in today for a plate of cashew chicken with an egg roll and a Pepsi, for a grand total of $6.62. As I waited, I looked around the restaurant and remarked at how little it has changed over the years. Seven booths, original art on the northern wall (from the owner's daughters, perhaps?), photos of specialty dishes in an illuminated sign on the southern wall. The prices appear to be the same as they were in 1994. Soda is still 75 cents. The floors, trays, and tabletops were spotlessly clean. This led me to take the exceedingly rare (for me) step of putting a dollar in the TIPS jar at a serverless restaurant.

Five minutes later, my piping-hot order was ready. The menu cautions that the cashew chicken is "Thai Spicy" style, which means the brown sauce is considerably spicier than you'll find at most strictly-Chinese restaurants, and instead of chopped celery, there are lots and lots of onions. The chicken was lean and fully cooked, with nary a bit of gristle or fat to be found (are you listening, Cajun Big Easy?). The cashews were fresh, too - nothing ruins cashew chicken like cashews that are starting to turn.

The fried rice was flavorful enough to be tasty by itself, though it's better when mixed with the spicy brown sauce. The egg roll was a bit chewy and maybe a little heavy on the ginger, but still enjoyable.

So now you've been told about Asian Express. Come early or order to go (remember, there are only seven booths), but you'll get a lot for your money.

* What are pogs? http://www.badfads.com/pages/collectibles/pogs.html

E Chen's (Karric Square/Frantz Road)

The thought occurred to me, as I was enjoying my second plate of Asian lardy goodness at E Chen's, that food is the only substance nearly everyone abuses. We look down our noses at crack addicts and dumpster-diving winos, but we all like to gorge ourselves at lunch from time to time, especially if we've had a bad day.

And I'd had the kind of morning at work that would drive a man to go drink until he pukes up his pancreas, or smoke green plants until Kid Rock lyrics sound profound. Except that a responsible head-of-household is supposed to be beyond that sort of thing...ahem. So I decided to escape the blues by visiting E Chen's all-you-can-eat Asian buffet in Karric Square. At least I called a friend to join me. They say if you gorge alone, it's an indication that you have a problem.

I've worked in Dublin since 2005, and I have found no better Asian buffet in the Northwest area than E Chen's. The staff is friendly and efficient. The restaurant is clean, well-decorated, and large, and by request, you can be seated in a back room where ESPN is shown on two giant projection televisions.

The buffet consists of four large serving stations under a sky-blue painted ceiling. It gleams like a leprechaun's pot of gold, or Chad Johnson's grille. The stations are thoughtfully spaced, so there's plenty of room to serve yourself without jostling and bumping other patrons, even at the height of lunch hour. Which is a crucial consideration, given the ample dimensions of many buffet regulars.

As for the food:
* The hot and sour soup was hot. Sour, too.
* The spring rolls were terrific.
* The General Tso's chicken was lean and fresh. Some buffets use such fatty chicken that you suspect them of battering globs of chicken fat and passing them off - not E Chen's. General Tso wouldn't stand for that, and neither should you.
* The Mala string beans were also fresh - bright green and resilient to the touch, not the sad, wrinkly, dark-green leftovers I've had elsewhere. I chose them mainly to kid myself that I was eating healthy.
* I'm sorry I didn't note the official name of the pulled-pork-and-onions dish, but it's always available, and it's my favorite. Lean pork in a sweet and slightly spicy brown sauce with fresh onions. Great stuff.
* There's a combo dish of chopped link sausage, peppers, and onions that was also very good. Onions are a great defense mechanism against demanding coworkers.
* There was pizza, but I didn't try it, just as I wouldn't try Kung Pao if they served it at Pizza Hut.
* There was sushi, but I'm an uncultured Midwesterner who can't bring himself to eat raw fish. I also have a shellfish allergy that causes me to, well, die. My dining buddy said the sushi was excellent.
* There were tasty-looking brownies and cakes and soft-serve ice cream for dessert, but after two plates of entrees and a bowl of soup, I couldn't eat another bite. I was lucky I could move without the aid of a Hoveround.
* The staff did a fine job of replenishing the serving trays. I never saw one less than 1/4 full.

Even with a $2 tip, the check was under $9. A little more than I like to spend at lunch, but I knew no simple sandwich could bring me out of my work-induced doldrums like E Chen's - a virtual opium den of Asian culinary goodness in unlimited quantities.